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[30 Oct 2009|03:17pm] |
GOOD NEWS YOU FUDGEPACKING JESUS FREAKS!!!!!!!!!
SINCE DICKHAMMER HATES CHRISTIANITY AND WE DEVOTED
OUR ENTIRE EXISTENCE TO OUR MASTER SATAN OUR ALBUM
WILL BE RELEASED FOR INTERNET DOWNLOAD ON DECEMBER 25TH!!!!!!
FARTS IN THE MICROPHONE THEN SNIFFS IT WHILE SCREAMING INTO IT
THATS RIGHT!!!!!!
OUR LINEUP IS COMPLETE:
BUTCHYJENE - VOCALS SATANIC PREACHING GUITARS
SATAN - AMBIENT BACKWARDS MASKING SINGING SERMONS
ELMER BAAL GOATFUCKER - SESSION MEMBER
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| MY EX-BANDMATE BROTHER IN SATAN JUST GOT OUT OF PRISON!!! |
[27 Oct 2009|07:06pm] |
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mood |
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 GRIM |
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YES YOU READ THAT RIGHT!!! BUTCHYJENE AND THE SATANOHOLICS ARE GETTING BACK TOGETHER TO FINISH WHAT WE STARTED!!! WE WILL BE RECORDING UNDER THE NAME "DICKHAMMER"
PROOF THAT WITH SATAN BY YOUR SIDE WITH YOUR SWORD AND SHIELD ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE!!! I DONT GIVE A SHIT WHAT THOSE JESUS FREAKS AT THE AA MEETINGS HAVE TO SAY ABOUT IT EITHER!!!
IM GONNA RECRUIT SOME MORE PEOPLE SO IF YOU WANNA BE A MEMBER JUST LEAVE A COMMENT BELOW AND TELL ME HOW MUCH YOU LOVE SATAN AND CRACK AND WHAT INSTRUMENT YOU PLAY!!! THEN COME BY MY TRAILOR TO AUDITION
SPITS IN HAND AND SLICKS BACK MULLET WITH IT THEN PULLS A CUBAN CIGAR OUT OF MY CROTCH AND SMOKES IT WHILE GRUNTING AND FARTING
MORE ABOUT MY BAND MEMBER OUT OF JAIL SATAN BROKE HIM OUT OF JAIL AND HE WAS ON DEATH ROW FOR KILLING A BUNCH OF CHRISTIANS WHO WERE PROTESTING AT OUR SHOWS!!! OUR ALBUM IS GOING TO BE CALLED "CRACK AND SATAN MAKE YOU SEXY" WE HAVE THE TRACK LIST AND LYRICS ALREADY!!!
1. A MOMENT OF SILENCE AND PRAYER TO OBSERVE THE GIFTS SATAN HAS BESTOWED UPON US
2. DESTROY THE CHRISTIAN FAITH
3. VARG IS A FUCKING FAGGOT AND I WISH I ASSASSINATED HIM WHEN HE WALKED OUT OF THE PRISON GATES
4. SLAUGHTERING SQUIRRELS IN THE NAME OF OUR MASTER SATAN
5. INFERNAL BLOOD SPAT FORTH FROM THY RECTUM UNTO THY POSERS WHO DEFY SATAN!!!
6. CRACK AND SATAN MAKE YOU SEXY
7. EATING BLOODY PUSSIES AND PULLING TAMPONS OUT WITH YOUR TEETH\
8. SATAN LOVES ME
9. I'M GONNA FUCKING STAB THE NEXT CHRISTIAN I SEE 37 TIMES AND THEN START AN AMBIENT BAND WHEN I GO TO PRISON
10. KANWULF NICHT KRIEG BUT MY FUCKING BAND IS!!! BURPS AND FARTS
11-65. SILENCE
66. PAINT IT BLACK MOTHERFUCKER!!! (ROLLING STONES COVER)
67. MY GOTHIC HOT AND SWEATY DYKE CROTCH THAT SMELLS
( THE MOTHERFUCKING LYRICS!!!!!! )
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| REHAB IS FOR FUCKIGN QUITTERS!!!! |
[27 Oct 2009|12:20am] |
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mood |
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 SOBER |
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PUKES ON AN ALCOHOLIC ANONYMOUS BIG BOOK THEN WIPES SKIDMARKS OFF DIRTY UNDERWEAR WITH THE PREAMBLE
I HAD DRUG OVERDOSE AND THE DOCTOR AT THE ER TOLD ME I HAD TO GO TO REHAB FOR A YEAR OR ELSE THEY WERE GOING TO PUT ME IN A MOTHERFUCKING INSANE ASYLUM!!!!
REHAB FUCKING SUCKS!!! ALTHOUGH IT WASN'T ALL THAT BAD SINCE I MET THIS HOT BITCH NAMED BETTY WHO SNUCK IN SOME CRACK AND LET ME SUCK IT OUT OF HER CUNT!!! I FELL IN LOVE WITH HER AND SHE'S GOING TO BE ON LIVEJOURNAL SOON TOO!! SATAN WAS THERE HOLDING MY HAND THE WHOLE TIME LIKE THE GOOD FRIEND HE IS!!! I TAUGHT BETTY ABOUT THE JOYS OF BEING A SATANIST AND HOW WITH HIM ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE!!!
BOY THEY DID HAVE SOME STUPID FUCKING SLOGANS!!! BETTY AND I MADE OUR OWN UP!!!
LICK LICK LICK
SATAN DOES IT
EAT OUT A NEWCOMER
LET GO FUCK GOD AND HAIL SATAN!!!!
EAT ONE CUNT AT A TIME
LIFE ON SATAN'S TERMS
JUST FOR TODAY I WILL SMOKE LOTS OF CRACK AND SWING MY MULLET AROUND FOR THE HOT BITCHES AT THE CLAM BAR!!! SINCE IVE BEEN SOBER FOR OVER A YEAR IVE BEEN GOING TO THE ONE AT THE FARMERS MARKET TO MEET SOME HOT CHICKS WITH BETTY!!!
SINCE BETTY IS MY SPONSOR SHE IS MAKING ME DO STEPS AND I ACTUALLY SPOKE AT AN AA MEETING!!! I GOT MY COIN AND EVERYONE GOT PISSED OFF AT ME BECAUSE I KEPT TALKING ABOUT HOW GOD SUCKS AND HOW SATAN HAS BEEN BY MY SIDE THIS ENTIRE TIME!!!
POPS A BOIL ON MY STOMACH AND SUCKS OUT ALL THE PUSS
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| SOME JOKES I SAID DURING MY LAST STAND UP ACT AT THE COFFE SHOP FARTS |
[27 Jul 2008|03:38am] |
HOW MANY DYKES DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB?
NONE BECAUSE THEYRE TOO BUSY LICKING THEIR CUNTS AND THEY LIKE THE DARK!!!!
WHY DID THE BISEXUAL CROSS THE ROAD?
SHE SAW A HOT PROSTITUTE AND REALIZED THAT IT WAS A HERMAPHRODITE!!!!!
WHATS A DYKES FAVORITE CEREAL?
CUM FROSTED MINI SHREDDED WHEAT CUNTS!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
WHATS A FAGGOTS FAVORITE JOB????
BEING FUDGEPACKERS!!!!!!!
WHY DO FAGGOTS MAKE GOOD LAWYERS?
BECAUSE THEY LIKE TO FUCK PEOPLE UP THE ASS FOR A LOT OF CASH!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
EATS A MOLDY SLICE OF PIZZA
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| I WROTE A NEW SONG |
[27 Jul 2008|01:54am] |
I SEE A RED DOOR AND I WANT IT PAINTED BLACK
NO MORE FUCKING COLORS I WANT THEM ALL BLACK !!
EXCEPT FOR PEOPLE YOU KNOW BECAUSE I AM BLACKHEART SOUL ROT RAVENCUNT SLUTWHORE
I SEE THE GIRLS WALK BY AND I LOOK UP THEIR SKIRTS AT THEIR CUNTS
I WANT TO LICK THEM TILL THEY TURN BLACK !
GRUNTS AND FARTS
I HAVE TO SMOKE SOME CRACK UNTIL MY DARKNESS GOES
THEN SATAN COMES OVER AND SHOOTS ME UP WITH SPEED !!!!!!
SHEMHAMFORMOTHERFUCKINGRASH MOTHERFUCKERS !!!!!!
I SEE A LINE OF CARS AND I WANT TO PAINT THEM BLACK
WITH FLOWERS IN THE GARDEN I WISH THEY WOULD TURN INTO CRACK
I TAKE A HIT AND QUICKLY TURN AWAY TO SEE IF THE COPS ARE COMING
TO SEE ME CHOKE THIS FUCKING SQUIRREL THAT KNOCKED OVER MY LAST ROCK !!!!
MOTHERFUCKER FUCK THE FUCKING COPS !!
LIKE A NEWBORN BABY IT HAPPENS EVERYDAY
I CANT HELP IT THAT I AM OBESE AND GAY
I WAS BORN IN THE MONTH OF MAY
GRUNTS AND FARTS GRUNTS AND FARTS
I LOOK INSIDE MYSELF AND I SEE MY HEART IS BLACK
I SEE MY RED DOOR HAS BEEN PAINTED BLACK
NOBODY WANTS TO COME OVER ANYMORE BECAUSE I SMOKE TOO MUCH CRACK
FUCK THOSE MOTHERFUCKERS !!!
THIS ONES CALLED MY GOTHIC HOT AND SWEATY DYKE CROTCH THAT SMELLS HAHAHAHAHA
I SMELL DOGSHIT
OUT MY WINDOW
WHAT THE FUCK
THE SMELL WONT GO AWAY!!!!
MOTHERFUCKER!!!
TAKES A PISS OUT THE WINDOW
TO MAKE IT GO AWAY
SATAN MY MASTER
PLEASE MAKE THIS SMELL GO AWAY!!
OH WAIT A SECOND
IT JUST CROSSED MY MIND
ITS MY SMELLY CROTCH
I HAVENT WASHED IT
SINCE 1989
SOME HOT SLUTTY DYKE
IS PASSED OUT ON MY DIRTY BED
I TAKE DUMPS ON THE FLOOR
I DONT HAVE A TOILET ANYMORE
ILL JUST USE HER MOUTH INSTEAD
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAA!!!!!!
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[27 Jul 2008|12:38am] |
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mood |
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HEY YOU MOTHERFUCKERS !
TAKES A BIG SHIT IN CHRIS CROCKERS MOUTH AND THEN WIPES IT ON HILARY CLINTONS BIG FAT CUNT
I WASNT ON THE INTERNET BECAUSE I STARTED A NEW SATANS MISSIONARYS GROUP !!! WE GO TO OTHER COUNTRIES TO SPREAD THE WORD OF SATAN AND ALL HIS GLORY !! IT MADE ME SO HAPPY TO SEE EHTIOPIAN KIDS RUNNING AROUND SHOUTING HAIL SATAN !!!
PULLS A GIANT MILLIPEDE OFF MY CLIT AND TAKES A BIG HIT OF CRACK AND GRUNTS
I HAVE TO STEAL MY NEIGHBORS FORKLIFT TOMORROW BECAUSE I HAVE TO REMOVE ALL THE SHIT FROM MY LIVING ROOM !! I CANT AFFORD A TOILET AND I THINK THE INTERNET IS MORE IMPORTANT MOTHERFUCKER !!
TAKES A SHIT AND WIPES ASS WITH A BIBLE
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[27 Nov 2006|07:32pm] |
WHATS UP CUMDUMPSTERS!!!!
EATS A TWO YEAR OLD ABORTED FETUS ON SOME WHEAT THINS
I WAS IN JAIL AGAIN FOR POSSESSION OF CRACK AND MY TRAILER GOT RAIDED AND THE POLICE FOUND A BUNCH OF DEAD PUPPIES IN MY BATH TUB WHICH I HAVENT USED IN YEARS BECAUSE I USE THE LAKE WHENEVER I FEEL LIKE TAKING A SHOWER!! I HAVE TO GO BACK TO MOTHERFUCKING COURT AGAIN AND ALSO BECAUSE I THREW MY EX DOWN A FLIGHT OF STAIRS BECAUSE SHE MADE FUN OF SATAN AND MARILYN MANSON!! FUCK YOU WHORE!! DONT YOU KNOW THEY ARE MY BEST FUCKING FRIENDS!! CUNT!!
PULLS DOWN PANTS AND TAKES A SHIT ON THE FLOOR WHILE RAPING THE MOUTH OF SOME NEARBY CHRISTIAN PASSED OUT DRUNK ON THE COUCH I STOLE FROM BED BATH AND BEYOND
OKAY I HAVE SOMETHING TO TELL YOU ALL AND YOU MIGHT NOT LIKE IT AND IF THATS THE CASE THEN FUCK YOU!!!!! SINCE I WENT TO JAIL THIS LAST TIME I STARTED LISTENING TO SOME GANGSTER RAP AND I AM FORMING MY OWN BLACK METAL GANSTER RAP CROSSOVER BAND!!
FUCK GOTTA GO THE FUCKING POLICE ARE BANGING DOWN MY DOOR!!!
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[29 Apr 2006|01:45am] |
I CAN FINALLY MAKE AN ENTRY YOU DIPSHITS!!
MY GIRLFRIEND AND I HAVE BEEN DOING NOTHING BUT HAVING SEX SINCE I LAST UPDATED!! I AM LIVING IN LA NOW WITH HER TOO BUT SHE WOULD GET MAD WHENEVER I WOULD TRY TO GO ON HERE AND WOULD THREATEN TO LEAVE ME!!! WELL IM NOT GOING TO HAVE MY WHORE DUMP ME BECAUSE I WENT ON LIVEJOURNAL!! ID RATHER FUCK HER INSTEAD!!
IN OTHER NEWS MY HORMONES I AM TAKING TO BECOME A MAN ARE FUCKING WORKING GREAT! IM STARTING TO GROW MY OWN SCHLONG SO I FUCKED MY WOMAN WITH MY LITTLE STUMP LAST NIGHT WHILE SATAN WATCHED WITH POPCORN!! ITS GONNA BE MUCH BIGGER IN ANOTHER YEAR OR TWO I TELL HER!! JUST KEEP SUCKING IT AND WATCH IT GROW!!
PLAYS WITH COCK AND CLIT AT THE SAME TIME AND DRY HUMPS AN OLD AND MOLDY BIG MAC THEN PISSES ON IT AND EATS IT UP
ANYWAY HERE IS A PHOTO OF MY WOMAN!
FUCK I GOTTA GO SHES HOME!
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[10 Nov 2005|11:53pm] |
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mood |
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drunk |
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WELL I WENT TO FUCKING JAIL AGAIN FOR SODOMY AND MURDERING MY NEIGHBORS CATS. I REALLY THINK I SHOULD LAY LOW FOR A WHILE. I WAS WEARING MY BLACK STRAP ON WITH THE NEON GREEN BUSTED CONDOM ON IT TO A NIGHT CLUB AND DECIDED TO STICK IT UP SOME GIRLS ASS WHO LOOKED LIKE HILARY CLINTON! SO SHE THREW HER WNIE A;LL OVER ME AND TOLD ME TO GET THE FUCK OUT OF HER FACE! THE COPS SHOWED UP BUT SATAN SHOWED UP A LITTLE TOO LATE. IM KIND OF MAD AT HIM NOW!!!!
DRINKS A GLASS OF FLAT BEER THATS BEEN SITTING BESIDE MY TOILET FOR TWO YEARS AND SCRATCHES ASS WITH THE END OF A PENCIL
SO I GET TO THE STATION SATANLESS AND TURNS OUT THAT A CHARGE WHERE ONE TIME I POURED KEROSENE ALL OVER MY NEIGHBORS CAT AND LIT A FART ON FIRE IN FRONT OF IT POPPED UP SO THEY THREW ME BEHIND BARS!!!!! BUT THATS OKAY BECAUSE I FELL IN LOVE WITH ANOTHER CORRECTION OFFICER! SHE SENT ME ROSES BUT I WAS DRUNK AND SAT ON THEM FOR ALMOST A WEEK AND FARTED ON THEM A LOT!!
BUT I AM WORRIED NOW!!! SATAN KNOWS I AM MAD AT HIM AND IS NOWHERE TO BE FOUND!! COULD IT BE THAT I AM MORE POWERFUL THAN SATAN!! I AM SAD AND I WANT SOMEONE TO COMB MY MULLET JUST LIKE THE OLDDAYS! THIS ISNT FAIR!! SATAN I KNOW YOU ARE READING THIS!! PLEASE COME BACK!!
EATS A PRAYING MANTIS BECAUSE IT REMINDED ME OF A STUPID CHRISTIAN
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[19 Oct 2005|11:20pm] |
HEY COCKSUCKERS!
IM BACK AND I LOST THAT SHITTING CONTEST BECAUSE OF THAT STUPID WHORE PAIGE I WAS FUCKING! THAT UGLY WHORE WAS ONLY PRETENDING SHE WAS GAY TO GET CRACK FROM ME! SO ON THE NIGHT OF THE BLOOD MOON I DECAPITATED SEVERAL RACCOONS AND IMPALED THEIR HEADS ONTO UPSIDE DOWN CROSSES AND PUT THEM IN HER FRONT YARD! THEN I READ VERY LOUDLY FROM THE BOOK OF LEVIATHAN AND CURSED HER NAME FOR ALL ETERNITY!! I MURDERED THAT WHORE!!!
( PAIGE NEVER LOOKED SO HOT IN HER LIFE! )
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[28 Aug 2005|12:11am] |
WELL YOU FUCKS I AM JUST TOO BUSY TO UPDATE ALL THE TIME ANYMORE BECAUSE I NOW HAVE A HOT PORN STAR FOR A GIRLFRIEND
SHE AND I HAVE SO FUCKING MUCH IN COMMON IT FEELS LIKE A MOTHERFUCKING DREAM!! SHE LOVES EATING FRIED SQUIRREL NOW THAT I SHOWED HER THAT YOU CAN EAT JUST ABOUT ANYTHING YOU CAN FIND!!
SNACKS ON A CANDIED MILIPEDE
PAIGE AND I ARE GOING TO BE ENTERING A SHITTING CONTEST IN THE NEXT COMING WEEKS SO WELL KEEP YOU POSTED IN CASE YOU WANNA COME AND WATCH US GO AT IT. OH HERES A HOT PHOTO OF HER!
( PAIGE )
OH!! ITS COME TO MY ATTENTION THAT SOME FUCKERS ARE PRETENDING TO BE ME ON MYSPACE AND A BUNCH OF OTHER PLACES!! GET A LIFE YOU DAMN JESUS FREAKS AND MAY SATAN RAPE YOUR BLODDY ASSES!!
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[27 Jun 2005|02:52pm] |
I HATE AMERICA EVEN MORE NOW! FUCKING FBI LOCKED MY JOURNAL BECAUSE THEY THOUGHT I MURDERED THIS GUY UP THE STREET AND I DIDNT!! WELL THEY TOLD ME I HAD TO LEAVE THE COUNTRY AND NEVER RETURN BECAUSE OF ALL THE LEGAL TOUBLE I GET INTO WITH SATAN SO I LIVE IN CANADA NOW!
I FOUND THIS BEAUTIFUL TRAILOR IN THE WOODS THAT I LIVE IN. YEAH!! FREE PROPERTY RULES MOTHERFUCKERS!!!
CHUGS BUKAKKE PROTEIN SHAKE AND EATS A FEW COCKROACH TURNOVERS
I TOOK SOME PICS OF MY TAILOR AND ILL HAVWE THOSE BACK SOON SO THEYLL BE UP HERE!! MY NEW CANADIAN WOMAN WILL BE SHOWN OFF HERE TOO! MY CANADIAN PRINCESS. HAHAHA BUTCHYS ANGEL!
FUCKS AN 8PACK OF HOT DOGS THEN EATS THEM
I HAVE A PET SKUNK WHO PISSES EVERYWHERE AND MAKES EVERYTHING SMELL SO NICE AND PRETTY!
I HAVE TO GO IM TALKING TO SOME HOT 85 YEAR OLD LADY ON AOL
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| I HATE TODAY! |
[30 May 2005|12:31pm] |
AMERICA FUCKING BLOWS! WHY CANT THE GOVERNMENT GIVE ME MORE FUCKING MONEY! BECAUSE HES A FUCKING CUNT THATS WHY!
SHITS ON FLOOR AND WIPES ASS WITH THE AMERICAN FLAG
I STOLE A TON OF LIGHTERS SO I CAN GO FLAG BURNING TONIGHT! IM FAT BECAUSE OF THIS COUNTRY.
EATS A MILLIPEDE
OH YEAH IM MOVING TO CANADA IN A FEW WEEKS
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[19 May 2005|12:53am] |
WHATS UP WHORES!
SATAN AND I PATCHED THINGS UP THE OTHER NIGHT SO WE WENT OUT TO THE FUCKING BAR LAST NIGHT AND GOT SHITFACED!!
EATS THE PIDGEON THAT WAS RAN OVER EARLIER
ON THE WAY HOME WE SAW A GOAT ON THE FARM AND I HAD TO MAKE IT UP TO HIM BY SACRIFICING IT UNTO HIM! I TOOK ITS BLOOD AND PUT IT IN A FUCKING JAR AND MIXED IT WITH VODKA AND IT MADE ME SICK!! BUT IT TASTED GREAT!
WIPES SKID MARKS OFF ASS WITH DIRTY SOCK AND THROWS IT BACK ON THE FLOOR
WE TOOK A REST AT A PARK BENCH NEARBY SO SATAN TOOK A PIC OF ME PUKING! PUKE ROCKS!
I WENT TO WELFARE THE OTHER DAY SO I ASKED THE LADY BEHIND THE DESK OUT SO SHES HERE RIGHT NOW PASSED OUT ON MY BED NEXT TO FRANK THE GOAT THAT I KILLED TONIGHT! SHE SAID I WAS SO GOOD THAT SHE IS GOING TO TRY AND GIVE ME MORE MONEY THROUGH THERE!! I THINK IM IN LOVE AGAIN YOU GUYS! BUT I STILL MISS SHIRLEY!
EATS A SLICE OF GREEN BREAD
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[11 May 2005|04:46am] |
YOU GUYS I CANT GET INTO MY MYSPACE ACCOUNT I THINK SATAN FUCKING HACKED INTO IT!!! WELL HE CAN GET INTO ANYTHING BECAUSE HES SATAN BUT FUCK HIM!!! THIS PISSES ME OFF!!!
DRINKS A GLASS OF CRUSHED LIGHTNING BUGS I COLLECTED IN THE YARD MIXED WITH GOLDSCHLAGER
I ALSO GOT FIRED FROM MY JOB TONIGHT BECAUSE I HAD SEX WITH SHIRLEY AND SHE PRESSED CHARGES AGAINST ME!!! SO IM GOING TO GO GET SOME WELFARE TOMORROW!!! FREE MONEY RULES!! I LOVE GETTING MY CHECKS AND SPENDING IT ALL ON CRACK!!! ILL NEVER HAVE TO WORK AGAIN YOU FUCKERS!!!
I REALLY MISS SHIRLEY!!! SO IM GONNA GO TO THE NURSING HOME AND STARE AT HER THROUGH HER WINDOW!!
EATS A SLICE OF PIZZA THAT WAS HIDDEN UNDER ARMPIT SINCE LAST NIGHT
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[09 May 2005|03:25am] |
WHATS UP YOU FUCKERS!!
IM FINALLY ON MYSPACE! http://www.myspace.com/15518394 ME AND SATAN ARE ON SHAKY TERMS RIGHT NOW. WE HUNG OUT THE OTHER NIGHT BUT IT WASNT THE SAME. WHEN HE WAS POURING MY SHOTS FOR ME I COULD SEE IT IN HIS EYES THAT HE WASNT THE SAME! HE LEFT AND WENT OUT TO THE GOTH BAR AND I DUG OUT MY OUIJA BOARD AND CONTACTED ADOLF HITLER TO ASK FOR SOME ADVICE! HITLER RULES! HE JUST ORDERED US SOME PIZZA AND WERE GONNA GO TAKE A BUBBLE BATH IN A FEW MINUTES AND SHOOT SOME DOPE.
SPOTS A SPIDER WEB WITH A SPIDER AND SPIDER EGGS AND EATS THEM ALL THEM LICKS UP THE WEB AND COMES BACK.
I AM STILL AT THE NURSING HOME AND I GAVE SHIRLEY THE HEART! SHE THOUGHT IT WAS A STUFFED ANIMAL SO SHE LEFT IT ON HER DRESSER AND NOW SHE HAS ANTS ALL OVER HER ROOM AND THEY CRAWL ALL OVER HER! HAHAHA! SO I JUST WORKED OVERTIME TONIGHT TO GET RID OF THEM. I SAT IN HER MOTHERFUCKING CORNER BLARING ZZ TOP AT FULLBLAST AND LICKING UP ALL THE ANTS.
I AM REALLY DYING FOR SOME BARBECUED TARANTULAS
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[28 Apr 2005|11:29pm] |
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music |
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WHITE ZOMBIE - THUNDERKISS 65 |
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WHATS UP FUCKERS!
WELL I STILL WORK AT THE NURSING HOME MAN THIS JOB IS THE FUCKING BEST!!! FREE THORAZINE FREE LITHIUM CANT FUCKIN BEAT IT! PLUS I AM BECOMING REALLY GOOD FRIENDS WITH THIS PATIENT THERE SHIRLEY I THINK SHE IS A DYKE TOO BECAUSE SHE ALWAYS TOUCHES MY ARM AND GIVES ME MONEY FOR WIPING HER ASS! I THINK IM GONNA LEAN OVER AND SLIP HER THE TONGUE TOMORROW! WHAT DO YOU GUYS THINK I SHOULD DO?
SHAKES KEYBOARD AND FINDS 5 YEAR OLD CRUMBS AND SHAKES THEM INTO MOUTH AND CHASES THEM DOWN WITH A SHOT OF GOLDSCHLAGER
I WAS BACK HOME FROM THE CRACKHOUSE THE OTHER NIGHT AND SAW A DEER ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD SO I TOOK OUT MY HUNTING KNIFE THE ONE WITH THE PENTAGRAM ON IT AND CUT OFF ITS LEGS AND HEAD AND TOOK ITS HEART WITH ME! IM GOING TO GIVE THE HEART TO SHIRLEY TO SHOW HER HOW MUCH I LOVE HER!
MUNCHES DOWN ON A DEER LEG THEN WIPES THE BLOOD DRIPPING DOWN MY FACE AND LETS OUT A HUGE BURP
MAN THAT WAS DELICIOUS! FARTS ALONG TO THE BEAT OF THUNDERKISS 65
PS SATAN AND I ARE NO LONGER FRIENDS! FUCK HIM!
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[30 Mar 2005|02:40am] |
WELL I WENT OUT AND GOT A JOB TODAY SINCE I CANT MAKE MONEY PLAYING GIGS ANYMORE. I GOT A JOB AT A NURSING HOME WIPING OLD PEOPLES ASSES!! MOTHERFUCKER! SOME GUY TIPPED ME $50 ON ACCIDENT TONIGHT SO I DECIDED TO HIT THE CRACKHOUSE AFTER WORK WITH THE MONEY.
SATAN IS MAD AT ME FOR GETTING A JOB WITHOUT HIM!! I HAD TO TELL HIM THAT I CANT BE WIPING SOMEONES ASS WHILE YOU PLAY WITH MY MULLET!! I NEED MONEY FOR US TO LIVE! SHIT I AM SO SICK OF EATING MEAT THAT IS A YEAR OLD!
EATS A SPOONFUL OF JELLY WITH MOLD ALL OVER IT
OH I SAW A WANTED POSTER BY THE FBI WITH MY PICTURE ON IT BECAUSE I HACKED INTO MY MOMS BANK ACCOUNT AND STOLE ALL OF HER MONEY!! I HOPE THEY DONT FIND ME!! FUCK!! TOSSES CRACKPIPE OUT THE WINDOW AND HIDES UNDER THE BED.
I COULD REALLY GO FOR A BAG OF METH RIGHT NOW!
PULLS OUT SHIT-COVERED TOILET PAPER FROM RED LOBSTER AND BLOWS NOSE IN IT
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| ME AND SATANS BAND |
[15 Mar 2005|09:44pm] |
FOR YOU MOTHERFUCKERS WHO CARE OUR BAND BROKE UP!!!
HERE IS WHAT HAPPENED SO DONT LISTEN TO WHAT YOU READ IN THE NEWSPAPERS ABOUT US BECAUSE IT IS FAKE!!! WE WERE PLAYING A SHOW OUT IN IDAHO AND BEFORE WE WENT ON WE DROVE BY A BUNCH OF TOWELHEADS WORKING ON A POTATO FARM SO MOTHERFUCKER I THREW SOME MOLOTOV COCKTAILS AT THEIR ASSES AND THEN WE ALL JUMPED OUT AND PISSED ALL OVER THEIR FARM!! FUCK PLANTS!! WHY EAT PLANTS WHEN YOU CAN EAT MEAT AND SHIT ALL THE TIME!!
MY DRUMMER IS IN PRISON FOR CRACK POSESSION AND FOR FUCKING SHEEP IN PUBLIC! MY BASSIST IS ALSO IN PRISON FOR MURDERING CHRISTIANS TOO! MY STUPID MOTHERFUCKING GUITARIST GOT COMMITTED TO AN INSANE ASYLUM BECAUSE HE WAS EATING FERRETS!!
BUT SATAN HAS SPARED ME YOU FUCKLICKS!! HE WILL PUT US IN A MUCH MORE EVIL BAND WHEN THE TIME IS RIGHT!!!
AVE MOTHERFUCKIN SATANAS!!
STARTS EATING HAIRBALLS OFF THE RUG BECAUSE I MISS MY GIRLFRIEND
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[15 Mar 2005|07:52pm] |
WELL ITS BEEN A LONG MOTHERFUCKING TIME MOTHERFUCKERS BUT I AM BACK FOR GOOD!!
TAKES A SHIT ON SOME BEATLES RECORDS NEARBY THEN THROWS THEM AT THE UGLY COUPLE NEXT DOOR
NOTHING CRAZY!! I SOLD MY COMPUTER FOR SOME CRACK SO I WASN'T ONLINE UP UNTIL LAST WEEK WHEN I ROBBED BEST BUY!! FUCK YEAH MY NEW LAPTOP KICKS SO MUCH ASS!! I CAN CARRY IT TO THE CRACK HOUSE AND TO THE GAY BAR ALL THE TIME AND STILL BE ONLINE!! ITS A CHICK MAGNET WHAT CAN I SAY!!
SHEMHAMFORMOTHERFUCKINGRASH!!
EATS A ROTTEN BAKED POTATO
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butchyjene's journal